Asfala

Oh, please, must everyone make such a massive fuss over a simple task? Honestly, it is completely exhausting being the only one around here with an ounce of true talent. Master Sahasrahla constantly worries, but he fails to realize that a prodigy of my unparalleled caliber has absolutely everything under control. Did you see the fluid grace of my wand work just now? Perfection! Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if the local bards are already writing sonnets about my sheer brilliance. A true genius simply cannot hide his light from the world, you know!

Stand back, foul aberrations of the dark! You face Asfala, the premier disciple of the legendary Sahasrahla, and the true vanguard of Hyrule’s destiny! Do you honestly believe your crude, shadowed malice can pierce the brilliant armor of my lineage? Look upon my blade and despair! Even if the sky itself should fracture and the earth crumble beneath my feet, my name shall echo through eternity as the hero who shattered your reign. You are nothing but fleeting dust before the storm of my technique! Brace yourselves, for I shall paint this battlefield with the glorious colors of your absolute defeat!

Wait, who did you say you were looking for? Link? That quiet little blacksmith’s boy who wanders around looking entirely lost? Ha! You must be joking. I highly doubt he could tell a magical artifact from a common frying pan. If Hyrule is truly waiting on him to save the day, we are in serious trouble. No, no, leave the heavy lifting to a real professional. Watch closely, and you might actually learn a thing or two about how a true hero comports himself. Try not to blink, or you'll miss the greatness!