Christmas Calamity - Animated Episode!

1. 'We could donate to the less fortunate to spread christmas cheer?'

(sweetly and timidly, he is sharing his ideas of what he and his friends could do on christmas eve)

2. 'What? Why? We have Santa-things to do!'

(nervously, in response to his friend, who is also dressed as a mall santa, saying they need to leave and quickly....)

3. 'I just want everyone to be happy and spread christmas cheer!'

(Happily, in  response to getting asked what he wants for christmas)

1.   'Listen, this is my favorite holiday - but the loss of the Christmas Calamity episode gets to me around this time of year' (miserably - she is remembering her favorite episode we made last year which was deleted along with the channel :/  )2. 'Which was an absolute fucking BANGER if you were fortunate enough to watch it by the way,'   (proudly, emphasis on 'banger', continued dialogue from last line)3. 'Was Mapzio (map-zeeoh) Island ever colonized? Because why do we have to watch this shit every Christmas?' (Somewhat irritated, Mapzio Island is the island the show takes place on, she is criticizing why they have to watch the Queen of Englands xmas speech when it isn't a British island)

4. 'We should dress up as mall Santas for the lulz. Also, call me by my real name or don't call me at all.' (Matter-of-factly and confident to begin, agitated towards the end at a nickname she doesn't like)5. 'Hohoho, what would you like for Christmas?'(Badly mimicking Santa)6. 'eehhhh... hmmm (thinking noises lol)...world peace.'(In response to the person asking what SHE would like for Christmas as a response to previous line, says 'World peace' very confidently and matter-of-factly again)

7 ' You have to have subtitles on to understand that joke, it's a spelling joke.' (I imagine this to be similar to how Peter Griffin from Family Guy explains the jokes in the series and breaks the 4th wall sometimes, do you know what I mean lol? If not, here is an exaple! https://youtu.be/ovZq09yfZPc )8. 'To slap Charles in the face, and to flick Vas - because his crimes against me weren't as bad, but pissed me off nevertheless.'(Grunting/in pain - in response to Santa asking her what her xmas wish is, Charles and Vas are her friends who screw her over pretty badly in this episode lol!) 

1. ‘Woaaaah, did you ask Santa for lung cancer this year? Tsk tsk!’

(In response to seeing Tatyana smoking, disapprovingly in a joking manner) 

2. ‘Episode? What do you mean by episode?’

(Confusion, forth wall break joke)

3. ‘Anyway, let’s go in, Queen Elizabeth will be doing her Christmas Eve speech soon!’

(Happily or excited)

4. ‘Ughhhh, im booored, let’s do something!’

(Bored or annoyed)

5. ‘Susie, any better ideas?’

(Asking his friend if she has any better ideas for what to do, her name isn’t Susie and she hates the nickname - so in a joking/leg pulling way)

6. ‘So what can I get you this year?…….. what do you want?……. Oh my f- (stopping himself from saying ‘oh my fucking god’) some Lego? A doll?’

(Dressed as a mall Santa, asking someone what they want for Christmas and getting more and more annoyed by them thinking and not replying)

7. ‘Liz?!’

(In shock, the person he was asking what they wanted appeared to be a ghost of the queen and he is shocked by this)

8. ‘We need to go’

(Worried and frantic, warning his friends that they need to leave)

9. ‘The ghost of Queen Elizabeth is here, and she is mad - we’ve got to go!’ 

(Same as previous line)

10. ‘Vas, we gotta go, come on!’

(The same again, grabbing the hand of his friend Vas and running away)

11. ‘Do you ever feel like you’ve forgotten something? Like something is very wrong?’

(Casually, sat on the couch at home thoughtfully)

1. ‘I wouldn’t be surprised if we had… it’s pretty close to the UK and it exists - the second fact alone is a catastrophic colonization risk’  (Casually - In response to his friend asking if the island they live on was ever colonized by the British - it will make sense in the full thing lol) 2. ‘Dude; it’s Christmas Eve, everywhere will be too busy…’(In response to his friend saying he’s bored and wanting to do something, slightly irritated)3. ‘You’re awfully quiet, got any festive ideas or what?’(Casually - Asking his other friend if he has any good ideas for activities to do)

4. ‘Hohoho! And you, my good sir - last but absolutely not least, what would you like this year?’(Dressed as a mall Santa, asking what somebody would like for Christmas and mimicking a jolly Santa)5. ‘Lint rollerrrr and a front doooor…. Santa can do that!… because Santa is magic and is also real.’(At the beginning he is writing down the request on paper and reading it aloud as he writes, he then happily announces in third person that ‘Santa can do that!’ - That he can fulfill his wish of a lint roller for Christmas. He turn turns to face the camera in a fourth wall break and matter-of-factly states that santa is real) 6. ‘Give this to Santa when he clocks in, will you?’ (In a hurry/worried - he is giving the list of gifts and wishes to a helper because his friend has told him worrying news and they have to leave the area fast) 

7. ‘Oh! I need to take the turkey out of the freezer for tomorrow! Oh my god, how could we forget something so important!’ (Realization - remembering something important)8. ‘Santa! Santa is here! Everyone to bed quick so he can leave presents and drink his milk!’ (Very excited/overjoyed - has just seen the real Santa and rushes everyone to bed)

1.’We have been informed, definitely not by rich and threatening outside sources, that we have to be VERY careful in how we go about making this joke’ 

(Newsreader voice )

2. ‘We have just been informed that the queen can not make it to her speech due to a minor setback, so we have her husband Prince Phillip instea-……. No?…. Okay… erm… in that case, here is a HD screening of ‘Diego Saves Christmas’ as substitute’

(Newsreader voice but with confusion around the middle and small pauses as he listens over the headset of what to say next in an unknown time - sorry for the queen of England joke hahaha) 

1.’Hohoho! If it isn’t Pretzel and a mortally-wounded Tatya! What a nice surprise! Do you two have any Christmas wishes this year?’ 

(Happily and jollily - in a good old Santa fashion! Pretzel is the name of a person; he is happy to see both the people again) 

2. ‘Tatya first, she might not have long left’ 

(Serious and not in a jolly manner anymore - it’s a joke because as mentioned earlier the second person, Tatya, is mortally wounded so he wants her to say her Christmas wish before the other person incase she succumbs to her injury lol) 

1. ‘Hey, how dare you say that about the queen!’  

(Angry or irritated) 

2. ‘Ohhh okay okay, I’ll let you go on your way then!’

(Happily / forgiving)

1. ‘I want my crown back’ 

(Whispering / ghostly / angry , playing a prank that she is a vengeful ghost)

2. ‘Waiiiiiit!’

(Yelling from off screen to hold up something from happening, yelling in a hurry)

3. ‘How dare you assume I died! I was on the.. ahem.. throne, if you’ll pardon the pun, I had a cheese pizza which didn’t agree with me and now I have to address that to a world who thinks I’m dead! Thanks for nothing, wanker!’

(Irritated and angry)

4. ‘Okay, your turn now’

(Peaceful and friendly)

‘And so, Christmas Day arrived, and everyone got their wishes! What a lovely day it Was for all indeed! Well, all except Tatya and Queen Elizabeth - who had to address what her ‘minor mishap’ entailed to a grieving nation. We don’t know what could have happened have happened if this episode wasn’t interrupted by British secret armed forces - but we thank them as they lead to this adventures completion early, just in time for Christmas I hope - I don’t know, it’s still November as I write this script and we have worryingly not started animating yet. And with that I leave you with one phrase - merry Christmas!’

(In a jolly/sentimental kind of narrator voice, you know what I mean lol? Gotta get those weird narrator speech intonations in there hahah)