Pitch is good for this one, the gravely voice you've given in this audition makes the tone sound a bit more dire. Delivery plays well with this as well as your pace for the lines is at a decent speed. Tone is grave and somber throughout, even at the parts where you're shouting I can still understand the intent in your lines. There are a few lines, the last ones in particular, where you could have attempted a louder delivery but I don't think this hurts your audition too much.
Thank you so much, I truly appreciate both the feedback & the opportunity.