Pitch here is certainly low, the gravely voice fitting grim tone you've chosen to emulate here. Delivery is well paced, except for the second lines which could be a tad faster. Tone is fine here, like I mentioned before, I like the grimness of how you conduct your character here. I think the final line could use a bit more boom behind it, as it is a resolute declaration; give the audition more power here. Also, there is some peaking in parts of your recording, so please adjust input so it doesn't blow out too much.
Would you like for me to submit a new take?