Feedback would be greatly appreciated.
Kinda sounds like you recorded this in a wind tunnel. It sounds environmental. Maybe you forgot to turn off the central air or have a fan on . Swallow before you begin speaking, after "any that grew in the garden", after "asked the rabbit", and after "real to everyone". Mouth noise after "stepped a fairy", after "and she came close to the little rabbit", after "all damp from crying", before "don't you know who I am.", and after "children have loved". I cannot tell if you omitted the word 'in', while you were reading "and in her hair". If not it needs more enunciation. Same applies for "ground" after "and fell to the", "little" immediately before "and gathered him up in her arms", and "asked". Weird pause between "think" and "where" followed by another swallow. Same goes for between "them" and "away w/me". If you have trouble hearing these things, I find headphone help.