[Only Read lines marked Octavia]

Octavia: “Lovely” assistant?

DJ-P0n3: It’s a compliment. Something wrong with that?

Octavia: Well, no, it’s just a little ... odd.

DJ-P0n3: Okay, so you don’t want me to call you lovely. I can deal with that.

Octavia: Wait, I didn’t--

DJ-P0n3: My homely, train-wreck of an co-host will be here to give you all perspective on jazz and classical music, while I comment on music ponies actually listen to.

Octavia: Lots of ponies love classical music!

[Only read the lines Marked Octavia]

Octavia: [Whispering.] Now?

DJ-P0n3: [Whisper] Yes, dummy.

Octavia: Um, yes. Well. Miss Vinyl, you are …

DJ-P0n3: Yeah?

Octavia: A ... horrible individual to know. Yes! And you should, um, learn some manners and act like a productive member of society! You... rascal.

[Long pause.]

Octavia: [Whisper.] Did, did I do it wrong?

[Only read the lines marked Vinyl Scratch]

Vinyl Scratch: Honestly? [Chuckle.] Then we’d be airing episode two in from space.

Octavia: How can you be this reckless?

Vinyl Scratch: Because that’s what I’m here for, my lovely assistant!

Octavia: I told you not--

Vinyl Scratch: [Yelling.] That is the spirit of radio! There’s no limits!

Octavia: Why are you standing up again?! Don’t get so--

Vinyl Scratch: We’re here for truth, justice, and the power of rock and roll! It is our way! It is the only way! Even if we stop broadcasting, our signal will just travel across the universe forever! Stars fade away, comets burn out, black holes devour suns, but even out there in the black, ROCK will always live on! That means music will last longer than the heavens themselves! That is radio! That is K-COLT! And THAT. IS. THE VINYL SCRATCH!

Octavia: ...you’re insane.