The Stoned Philosophers: Fullmetal Alchemist Abridged
Project Overview
Hello, we are The Stoned Philosophers, and we are abridging Fullmetal Alchemist. We've nearly completed work on the first script, and we have several fantastic voice actors on board with the project.
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Influenced by the armor to which he is bound, Alphonse is forced to speak in Shakespearean-style poetry, which he does not appreciate. His goal is to get the philosopher's stone in order to get his body back and stop role-playing.
Alone I lay, devoid of sleep, an iron shell my soul to keep. Away from home, without a ducat, brother, take thyself and fuck it!
I bring to you my brother, nearly lost. Dismantled, broken, needing of thine aid. A line fully defined was clearly crossed, and from his living flesh, a price was paid.
Egads, doth mine eyes deceive me? Or art these eyes my own? Woe betide the day we tread the realms of god alone.
Trisha Elric Abridged is a deadbeat mom on drugs. Her voice should be as similar to the original Trisha Elric as possible, as seen in this video, though should sound dazed / high some if not all of the time.
Ok hun! While you’re gone be sure to pick up some glue, sharpies, and cough syrup. Thaaaaanks.
*definitely baked* Wha..Huh? Oh, that’s nice.
No of course not! I am proud of you. It reminds me of your father.
Pinako Rockbell in this abridged series is a racist old grandmother with a grudge against Ishvalans and other races. Voice should sound as close to the original as possible, as seen here, ignoring the Taylor Swift part at the end, of course.
Sad and in disbelief: I just can’t believe it...My own son…While helping Ishvalans...
Impatient and slightly angry: Shut up and get him to the table!
No, there are no Filthy Ishvalans here.
Maes Hughes Abridged is a pimp in debt, and he runs very aggressive advertising. Rather than doting over his daughter, he often shows people pictures of his wares, attempting to lure in potential customers. Same doting voice as the Maes Hughes we all know and love.
Advertising a prostitute in the same way he dotes over Elicia in FMA proper: Just look at the legs on this one! I've got more photos if you wanna see 'em.
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