Calmer Chameleons
Project Overview
Hello! I'm looking for voice actors (male and female) to help me bring life to an array of a characters for a new project called Calmer Chameleons. Calmer Chameleons is a comedy podcast which features a large variety of characters and situations. There is no real agenda other than to entertain the listener. Because of the fast-paced comedic nature of the show, there will be multiple opportunities for voice actors to get involved and showcase their talents!
I am the chief writer for the podcast, and as such, I have a mountain of scripts that are just begging for a voice. I would be interested to hear from you if you feel that you can bring any of these sketches and characters to life in an entertaining way.
If you would like to listen to us, we're currently 3 episodes in and can be found here:
https://calmerchameleons.podbean.com/
Here's a quick FAQ to hopefully answer some of your questions upfront:
WHY THE NAME CALMER CHAMELEONS?
In all honesty, I just felt it was a funny pun. However, if you sit down and analyse it, as the podcast has little to no continuity, the nature of the show tends to change it's colours from sketch to sketch, Okay, I'm reaching, but that's the name and that's what we're sticking with!
IS THIS A PAID PROJECT?
While I would love nothing more than to pay people fairly, it's just not something I can do right now. The podcast is still young, but once it gains a bit of steam, I'm hoping to monetise through Patreon. If this takes off, I'll be able to afford to pay people or offer back payments for regular contributors. I hope this doesn't put you off applying.
WHY SHOULD I APPLY IF IT IS UNPAID?
That's a justified question. My hope is that Calmer Chameleons will help aspiring or amateur voice actors get a body of work under their belts. You'll be able to use these clips as part of showreels and auditions for other work. It shouldn't be a huge time-investment on your part either, as you will generally be performing short sketches.
WHAT KIND OF VOICES ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?
At this moment in time, anything. I have a variety of characters from all genders, races and ages. As a guide I have included some sample roles below that I'm keen to pair up with the right voice actor. Even if the ones below do not sound up your alley, get in touch anyway. Your voice could be exactly what I'm looking for in future!
DO YOU NEED ANY OTHER ROLES?
I'm always looking for more voice actors to collaborate with. If you're interested but the right part for you isn't here, just send me a private message with your showreel or any recordings. I'll listen to anything you send me.
HOW CAN I GET IN TOUCH?
If you are specifically interested in one of the roles below, then you can audition through the site as usual. You can also send me an MP3, link to Soundcloud or Dropbox/Google Drive with your files on and I'll get back to you as soon as I can. Any further questions, let me know.
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In this sketch, two characters (Brad and Alan) are discussing how to tackle feminism as men. Brad is the host, who is serious, whereas it become clear that Alan is just there to try and pick up women. Brad would be the straight man in the discussion, trying to earnestly win over his co-host. I have no specific opinion on type of voice or accent, so just go with what feels natural.
Hello
and welcome to another episode of our podcast "feminism for men". I'm
Brad and as
usual we will be discussing how we, as men, can be better feminists.No,
of course not. I mean, women shouldn’t get impunity for being horrible people.
However, those judgements shouldn’t be made based on their appearance.*sighs*
I am so sorry about what that just happened, listeners. However, I've decided
to leave this in to show what we are up against. Rampant misogyny is everywhere
Prunella is a upper class lady who is teaching the listener about correct dining etiquette. As the lesson goes on, the rules get more and more bizarre. I'm imagining an English, RP accent for this, but certainly interested to hear any speech quirks that you want to introduce.
No
doubt you are eager to fully educate oneself on the delicate balance of polite
dining etiquette. Consider me your
coach, Dutchess, and saviour when it comes to table manners and precise dinnertime
discipline.Number 1. Gentlemen
are not allowed to sit down at the table if a lady is present. All males must remain standing throughout the
entire meal until the lady leaves the room.Fingers
are the devil’s digits and they tempt us to touch ourselves
inappropriately. As such, do not eat
food with your fingers, point at people, or hold cutlery with your fingers
under any circumstance.
Mystic Mark is a psychic who uses his powers to try and seduce women. The sketch is basically Mystic Mark describing what he'd do on a date using his powers. I'm imagining a very serious, soft voice like David Blaine, but open to anything you'd like to try.
The
night is hot and heavy. Balmy, if you
will. My astral projected form slides
through the taffeta curtain with a sexual eeriness that cannot be ignored.Summoning
my spirit animal, I straddle the headboard like a goose, honking the sweet
sounds of love.We
may not be touching, but my tantric caress feels electric as it slides across
you. I call this move the Fondle Of
Tesla.
The part here is a guy who has found out that his best friend is dating his ex. He sends a jealous email to his friend in a transparent attempt to try and sabotage their relationship. I don't have any particular feelings about the accent, but I imagine the script will be delivered with a little more bile towards the end.
Hey Tom, just thought I’d send you a quick email to let you know how
pleased I am that you’ve started dating my ex-girlfriend! Can you imagine how thrilled I was to hear about that!? Such wonderful news...To
show you how totally and utterly fine I am about the situation, I thought I’d
give you some hot tips on how to make your relationship work. Remember, I was with Michelle for 5 years, so
I’ve learned a lot about her, what makes her tick, and what she hates.Michelle
is a pet person. There isn’t a single
pet in the world that she doesn’t like, so your best bet is to fill her life
with as many animals as possible. Turn
her sock drawer into a tarantula breeding ground. Dig a viper’s nest in the back garden. Send her a bouquet of lizards at work.
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