[Excited, then switching to professional maid mode before finally giving up on maintaining the Professional tone] Oh! Okay okay. He’s waking up. Come on Rem, just like we practiced. [Clears throat] Good morning, sir. As requested by Roswaal Mathers, we are here to greet you and show you around his fine—nevermind, just forget it.

[Explanation] She’s right, it's Master Roswaal's library. When you’re the greatest magic user in the country, you’re bound to have a lot of dangerous magical texts. Oh and fanfiction. Lots of it.

(Realization then disappointment and finally playful) I see…and Chode can be one very annoying bug. (Asked why she calls Subaru names). Oh? To mess with him, of course.

[Enraged. Ram thinks Subaru killed her sister] DID YOU DO THIS TO HER? [Subaru gives stupid response] Scream of Visceral Rage