Love the backstory you put in your comments. Excellent work identifying your audience and context! 

0:26 Mispronounced “Rhuddlan”. Don’t be afraid to look up how to pronounce words online if you aren’t familiar with them. Some great reference sources include Cambridge Dictionary (https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/), youglish.com, forvo.com and You Tube Videos among other places (there’s a lot of options out there). You can simply type in “How to pronounce [word]” in Google search and it should give you several references. Try to avoid the robot ones though.

Fantastic read! Definitely eerie vibes. I like how you even made “cheered” sound slightly creepy. I was waiting for an evil laugh at the end of the story haha.

Well done! Keep up the great work!!