The Sasspothecary Diaries (Abridged): Snark, Poison, Repeat
sillyVA for PAIRIN
She’s the “retired” courtesan who absolutely isn’t done being the hottest woman in any room. Saucy, elegant, and dangerously sharp-tongued, Pairin can make you blush and cry in the same breath. She takes Maomao under her wing, but don't get it twisted... she's not here to mother anyone. She's here to live, drink, and talk sh!t in expensive perfume.
“Try to touch my hair again and I swear I’ll gut you with a hairpin. Politely, of course.”
“Sweetie, if you think flirting is batting your eyelashes and giggling like a drowning squirrel, you need to spend one night out drinking with me. I’ll have half the capital on their knees and the other half begging to switch sides.”
“I’ve buried husbands, poisoned lovers, and once seduced an entire chess club just to win a bet. You think a few powdered bimbos in brocade scare me? Please. I eat concubines like hors d'oeuvres.”
Thank you for sending in your audition! The accent fits Pairin perfectly, and the attitude you brought is spot‑on... charming and lethally effective all at once. It’s exactly the blend we were hoping for. I absolutely loved it!
THANK YOU SO MUCH!! ^_^ i’m so glad 🫶🫶💗