You could be, if you weren’t hunched over all scared all the time. The only thing more pathetic is the way you’re sneaking off to a stall to get away from me. Stall’s for girls. You a girl, Jeremy? 
Yo, fucking dads, right?! He usually passes out by nine, you should come over, play X-box. You know with a squip, the only controller you need… is your mind?
 (with slight lisp) Sorry? I’m finally free of that shiny happy hive mind! When I get outta here, the ladies are gonna learn to love the real Richard Goranski! (an epiphany) And the dudes. Oh my god, I’m totally bi!

(Part of Squip Song)Freshman yearI didn't have a girlfriend or a clueI was a loser just like youGood times would onlySoar byI was grossAs every female would attestMy sexting was a futile questMy little penis was depressedHe was so lonelyPoor guyI wasHopeless, hopelessI wasHelpless, helplessEvery time I'd walk the hallwayI would tripI wasStagnant and idleI wasSo suicidalAnd thenThen, then, Then, then, Then, then, Then, then, Then, thenThen, then I got a Squip

16 bars of any musical theatre song