New World Adventures EMERGENCY RECAST!
pinchy17 for Kevar
This is a submission, not an audition. If I like your lines, you will be in the book, and you'll get a copy of the book delivered to an address of your choosing. No further recording required.
Full context:
“I could show ya’ how ta wield it,” said the man holding a dagger to Gwenevere’s throat.
“Ya’ surrounded!” said Kevar, another fireball forming above his hand. “Give the girl or ya’ all die!”
Extra comments:
Kevar is cocky. He likes his job, and the thought of things not going exactly his way doesn't even occur to him. I know his lines don't sound that funny, but he still thinks he is. To really get in the zone for this role, think of the most fun and joyful day you've ever had at the expense of someone you've truly hated. That's the frame of mind you need to be in to play as Kevar.
Common error:
Tenfold is said "TENfold" not "tenFOLD". The "ten" is the important part, because it's different than being paid "ninefold" or "elevenfold". The folding bit isn't the important bit of tenfold.
“I could show ya’ how ta wield it,”
“She ain’t worth it matey. Run a long and tell ’em that Kevar is takin’ care of ‘er now. I know how much you was paid, but he’ll prolly pay us tenfold.”“Drop it dwarf! Or tell ya’ boss ya’ got ‘er killed!”"Huh!" (winded from being elbowed in the gut)
“Ya’ surrounded!” “Give the girl or ya’ all die!”
"I could show you how to wield it" takes 1 and 2 were absolutely perfect! Everyone else, learn from this! “She ain’t worth it matey. Run a long and tell ’em that Kevar is takin’ care of ‘er now. I know how much you was paid, but he’ll prolly pay us tenfold.” Take 2 was brilliant. It didn't even occur to me that "I know how much you was paid, but he'll prolly pay us tenfold" could be said that way, but it really works very well. He's got absolutely no reason to rush that line at all. Love it. “Drop it dwarf! Or tell ya’ boss ya’ got ‘er killed!” Both brilliant. I like take 1 better, as I can really hear the panic you'd expect if one of your men just got a deep wound. "Ya' surrounded!" I like take 2 best, but I'm not sure why. I think it's because it's the cockiest one, and at this point he needs to sound cocky or else his prize will escape. "Give the girl or ya' all die!" You added "us", and although it's a fairly reasonable word to add, people who bought the paperback will feel cheated if their version has fewer words than the audio book. That aside, takes 1 and 2 sound extremely similar. I don't care, but I like to point out the little things to unpaid actors, because if you're auditioning for a high budget role, directors will think you're inexperienced if you submit a pair of similar takes. Take 3, I like better. "Die" is definitely a good word to put a little emphasis on, as it's a very important part of what's being said. Overall, good submission, but I'd need one without "us" in the last take for me to be able to use it in my project. This is, paradoxically, the part of the job I hate. There are so many truly brilliant submissions here, and all but one of you will get rejected. I want everyone to know, I meant every word written in every comment, and if yours doesn't get chosen, don't let that invalidate the nice things I said. A good director might pay hundreds for any of these clips, and I'm sent them all for free, and I'm forced to say, "Sorry for your volunteer work. It was all for nothing." Still, I hope my comments at least made the process worth while.