New World Adventures EMERGENCY RECAST!
Wumbologist PhD for Kevar
This is a submission, not an audition. If I like your lines, you will be in the book, and you'll get a copy of the book delivered to an address of your choosing. No further recording required.
Full context:
“I could show ya’ how ta wield it,” said the man holding a dagger to Gwenevere’s throat.
“Ya’ surrounded!” said Kevar, another fireball forming above his hand. “Give the girl or ya’ all die!”
Extra comments:
Kevar is cocky. He likes his job, and the thought of things not going exactly his way doesn't even occur to him. I know his lines don't sound that funny, but he still thinks he is. To really get in the zone for this role, think of the most fun and joyful day you've ever had at the expense of someone you've truly hated. That's the frame of mind you need to be in to play as Kevar.
Common error:
Tenfold is said "TENfold" not "tenFOLD". The "ten" is the important part, because it's different than being paid "ninefold" or "elevenfold". The folding bit isn't the important bit of tenfold.
“I could show ya’ how ta wield it,”
“She ain’t worth it matey. Run a long and tell ’em that Kevar is takin’ care of ‘er now. I know how much you was paid, but he’ll prolly pay us tenfold.”“Drop it dwarf! Or tell ya’ boss ya’ got ‘er killed!”"Huh!" (winded from being elbowed in the gut)
“Ya’ surrounded!” “Give the girl or ya’ all die!”
Let's start with audio quality: Lots of white noise. It's not cheating to try to remove it yourself, but it will always come out worse than if you just recorded without the white noise to begin with. Your mic was set too sensitive. Whatever audio software you're using, it should tell you if you peaked or not. Learn how to find out. It's a very valuable skill. If your audio peaks, delete it, then go into the recycle bin on your computer, and delete it again, then create a text file with the same name, just so you can delete that too. As for the voice, I can tell you've thought very hard about how you sound, which is why it sounds completely wrong. I know that sounds weird as anything, but Kevar isn't thinking about how he sounds, so if you are, you won't sound like him. If you want to sound like Kevar, you need to think his thoughts. Things like, "This girl is worth a fortune! If I pull this off, I'll finally be able to buy that new horse I always wanted. Shit! He's pointing a crossbow at me! He knows I can have her killed, right? He knows shooting me isn't worth it, right? That damn dwarf will ruin everything! I don't want to kill another hostage, but I may have to! She's gone! No, my money! It may not be too late. I may still get her back." Think about those things. Forget about how you sound. Then, and only then, will you sound perfect.
Thanks man! Your feedback is really top notch. I might try again after looking up some white noise tutorials.