Midnight Pals: The Tale of the Tell-Tale Heart
Cursed with Glorious Purpose for Neil Gaiman
Fictionalised, parody version of the horror-fantasy author Neil Gaiman. Speaks in grandiloquent, poetic language, even when describing simple concepts. Obsessed with mythology and the power of story. Somewhat pompous and superior but tries to relate to people in a "cool teacher" way. Most of the other characters need Neil's lines to be 'translated' by Clive Barker (who can understand him as Clive "used to be British").
Slightly Americanised English accent—interviews with the real Gaiman are easy enough to find online, but good acting is more important than spot-on impressions.
- english
- male adult
- english
[ENTERING AN ANCIENT SCOTTISH CASTLE] Indeed! An edifice of the imagination, through which the dreams of the very centuries could pass! Can’t you feel the weight of human potential in the very stones?
[AFTER MARY SHELLEY AND EDGAR ALLAN POE PLAY A PRANK ON NEIL AND THE OTHER PALS USING ONE OF ROWLING'S SHED SKINS] (LAUGHING) Ah ha! Engaging in a spot of equestrecreation! (PAUSE AS NOBODY GETS IT) Horseplay, guys.
[ASKING JK ROWLING WHY HER BATHROOM CONTAINS A REALLY BIG SHOWER BUT NO TOILETS] Pardon me, Ms Rowling, but whilst we’ve begained your attendancies... our benighted minds must query as to the quintiliquent mystery of this bathing-chamber. it contains this hunormous showercade of singular proportion, which rains water upon us as the great god Hypnos himself showers us mere mortals with dreams every night. Albeit, the, ah, excrommodial lavatilities are conspicuous only in absentia.
