I like your voice here! The style and tone fit together nicely to create a strong take. It's also very unique, so well done! To improve, try adding some mix-ups to your read through the use of emotional variance. Instead of the read being relatively the same from start to finish, maybe add some emphasis on specific words and add pauses and breaks to portray a more genuine performance. You honestly are close to that already, though, so just keep at it!