Oh, yeah… I’m fine. It’s no big deal. I don’t really want to talk about it. (spoken at maximum speed) Ok yes I’ll tell you! I love to dig and drill, like seriously LOVE IT, but my Dad Principal Dig Dug won’t let me and he thinks that’s why mom left, because of all the digging he was doing, so he thinks its bad to dig, BUT I love to dig, my name is MR. DRILLER for crying out loud, I have a bunch of drills that are specifically FOR digging and drilling, and its SO UNFAIR! it’s such a WASTE not to dig, but dad thinks it’ll ruin my life just like it ruined HIS life and I just can’t stand it anymore, it’s tearing me up inside and I don’t know what to do! AUGH! <deep inhale>

No one else will join with me, and the school rules say it’s not an official club unless at least two people are in it. I need you to come with me, so we can found the Digging Club together! If it’s an OFFICIAL SCHOOL CLUB, Dad can’t stop me from participating… Cuz for school stuff, he has to act like a normal principal would, and not do stuff just because he’s my dad. So if I can’t found this club, I’ll never be allowed to dig again and then I don’t know… what… I’ll do! Die, probably! Can you die from not digging enough?! I’m pretty sure you can! I read a thing on the… thing!

Yeah… Dads. Always telling you what to do... Embarrassing you in front of your friends… Trying to crush your spirit into little tiny molecules of gravel, even though they don’t have the stones to work with REAL gravel anymore… That’s the way it is with every family! I’m sure you know the drill.