Okay, that's it. I'm sick and tired of everybody taking one look at me and running away 'cause they think I'm filthy. Well I got news for you: I didn't get primped and preened to have some overfed, pompous puffball tell me he's too good for me. I've got makeup on my butt, dude! And you don't even want to know about the cork!

Y'all better listen... I've been holding something in all winter and I'm about to LET IT OUT!