That was really good, I enjoyed your beast lines! I think you're having trouble with the pacing of the first line though "--" means you're being interrupted, in this case by yourself, so instead of stopping to think about the next line you should imagine yourself in the situation, someone's just burst into your room knocking down the door and as you're asking them what the hell they're doing, they pull out some weird alien thing and now that's your interest, you'd naturally interrupt your line of thought to ask what it is. Good attempt though and feel free to audition again especially since I think if you understand the pacing I think you can nail that first line like you did the other two.