“Whatever. Can you imagine what I’d look like if you had let me quit smoking for the wedding. I’d have to sew two pairs of these shorts together to cover my fat ass.”

*light kissing and giggling*-(she's making out with her husband)

“Oh God these are good,”-(foodgasm)

“Oh no lectures please. I know I shouldn’t. I pulled out some shorts from last season and couldn’t get them up past my thighs.”-(self conscious)

*moaning*-(having sex and climaxing with her husband)

*sexy yelping*-(from being spanked)

“I can’t believe how small my tits are,”-(annoyed)

 “You’d think a benefit of being chubby would be a decent rack, but I still have the little bumps I had in high school.”-(annoyed)