[SCREAMS] WHA- WHAT IS THIS? WHAT'S GOING ON? WHY AM I-? IS THIS SOME KIND OF SICK JOKE? I- I'M A WOMAN! HOW? I bet it was him.. The guy with the hamsters. I bet he's plotting against me.. He- He- What is- I don't understand?

Hey! I didn't ask to be a woman! It's hardly my fault! Now you're suspecting me? What did I do to deserve this?

Improvise something (If your vocal chords haven't died yet!)