That was fine. You got the tone down. You skipped the second line. You need to remember Angel Dust EXPRESSES a lot and is kinda over the top. You have to keep that in mind. You also got to project more. Try auditioning standing up and express yourself/loosen up and over time you'll be a fine Angel Dust. Thanks for auditioning but keep my feedback in mind!
TL;DR Tone was great, its everything else that needs to be improved.
Try listening to my original Angel Dust VA
LOLLL that switch-up was crazy!! love this