Carl, Destroyer of Planets and Other Such Things, is a sentient sock puppet brought to life through dark magic. He claims to be evil and intends on conquering the Earth, but his ADHD, inability to control the volume of his voice, manchild tendencies, lack of ability to think of genuinely evil plans, and loose grasp on reality all make him about as much of a threat to the world at large as a kid with a BB gun. His voice is very gruff and should sound a lot like comedian Bobcat Goldthwait if possible; feel free to randomly yell certain parts of the lines for emphasis.