Tales from the Puffington Bakery
Tiffany for Mindy Mintgumery
Mindy Mintgumery is a timid yet intensely meticulous junior compliance officer for the Alchemist Guild who takes rules far more seriously than anyone around her. A brilliant gadget-tinkerer with a squeamish streak, she appoints herself the bakery’s regulator—labeling, logging, and containing every magical ingredient… by force of clipboard if necessary.
Soft, polite, and slightly shaky at first—professional tone that trembles under pressure.
Awkward when reciting guild regulations—she clearly still reads from her clipboard and stumbles over phrasing, even though she’s worked there for years.
High-pitched squeaks or panicked bursts when grossed out or physically overwhelmed.
(Entering the bakery) Okay, Mindy. You’ve handled unstable enchantments. You can handle… a building. (deep breath) You can do this. You can do this. You can— (Daisy accidentally sweeps crud onto her. Long blink. Eye twitch.) AAAAAAH—WHAT IS ON ME?! (spinning in tiny circles) It’s in my hair—it’s in my collar—WHY IS IT WARM?!
(Shy and awkward introduction) M-my name is Mindy Mintgumery. I’m here on behalf of the Alchemist Guild. I-I’m a junior compliance officer… (clutches clipboard, reading) Before you can legally sell so much as a crumb, you’ll need proper labeling, hazard containment, fire certification, sanitation approval— (flips page) —insurance, tax registration, guild verification… (nose wrinkles, glances at Mei-Mei) …and that one needs a shower.
(Walking away, muttering to herself) This bakery doesn’t stand a chance. Improper documentation. No safety seals. Random vagrants in the rafters…It’s like chaos follows that girl wherever she— (She is suddenly scooped up by the runaway cart) AAAAAAHH!
