I thought your diction and articulation were excellent overall. There were a few words here and there that ended up a little slurred or mumbled, but overall it was very crisp and clear. Nice job!

Great energy and pacing with your read! When you have fun with a script and play with it, it comes through in your delivery; for example - nicely done with the second to last paragraph!

Don’t forget to tell us who your audience and demographics are in your homework. Really consider specifics of who, what, where, when, why and how. Think about how your audience is dynamically responding to you as you speak to them. This will continue to help bring the script to life and lift the words off the page. 

I felt like this was very close to being a fantastic read. But it still felt like a read in areas rather than a live sports commentation. Try to let loose even further and really imagine the scene playing out before you. Play even more with the funny phrases like “drizzle a little fizzle on the skizzle with the sizzle”. Does it sound rhythmic or musical? Use that, don’t be afraid to really play with it and jazz it up! Put even more emotions and feelings into it. Imagine the audience’s reaction as they watch it and how that affects your delivery too. Sometimes what we feel is big emotion really isn’t as big as we think it is in our delivery. Go even bigger and further! :D Take it to a level 10! This will help you really stand out in an audition like this. 

VA 201 class goes into the emotional rollercoaster and I highly recommend it if you are able to take it. It really helped me turn a corner in my own voice acting.

Good job with going back to the beginning of the line or to a solid place when you made a stumble - it makes editing later so much easier! 

Keep up the excellent work!