You may need to record in Mono. Right now all I hear is in my L headphone. But it was a good delivery!

Be sure to record and export your voice files in mono and not stereo. Your audio is panned all the way to the left.

Good start on visualizing the scene/context. Take it even further - how many recruits are you talking to? What do they look like? How are they reacting as you speak the words? Are they bored? Incredulous? Attentive? How old are they? How do you feel about what you are saying? Your audience’s reaction will affect how you deliver the words. Imagine them reacting in real-time as you say things. And how you respond to their reaction. Do you speak more confidently? Get louder? Quieter? More devious? Where are you when you’re talking? What time of day is it? What year is it? The more detail and the more context you add to your scene including emotional layers, the more real it will become and easier to make the script come to life.

Continue working on enunciation and articulation to fully and clearly pronounce the words and the letters within them and at the end.

Be sure to go back and quality check what you’ve recorded and check for any missed or changed words. This is important for auditions and gigs that you accurately read the script provided. 

Good work with adding some emotion and humanisms into your read. It feels like a more dramatic or theatrical read, rather than an authentic or genuine read. You’re on the right track, however it does still feel like a read rather than someone speaking the words genuinely or convincingly. This is a challenging skill to acquire, but the more you practice the easier it will become. Picture the scene you’ve created and how the person or persons you are talking to are reacting. Make it real in your mind’s eye, and let yourself genuinely respond to the situation. This will help lift the words off the page. Make use of change-ups in emotion, inflection, pacing, volume, pitch, etc. Keep it interesting to listen to. Look for ways to keep it realistic in a setting like this. Have an opinion about what you read. VA 201 goes into more of the emotional rollercoaster in voice acting, which is excellent, and VA 301 goes into more about different established acting techniques. Great classes to help you continue to advance in your voice acting career. Local improv and acting classes at theaters and such can be really helpful too. :)

Keep up the good work!