This was really nice! I did hear you mixing up those T sounds in words like peter, little, teetered, and jotting to D sounds so be mindful of those small things. Really articulate those T's so that there is no confusion for the audience or the words.

I really like your tone and the subtle changes in the emotions. This felt natural and real and that's what we want! What was nice is that when you listed off the animals and such, you made each one slightly different and not one noted. The pacing and pauses were great as well. I was invested the whole time!

Honestly I think this was a really great take. The only thing is just articulating those tricky little letters and words. Awesome job and I can't wait to hear more!