Love the voice you did here! I can genuinely hear your voice on an actual made-for-tv ad! Well done!

We talked about this in class—the sing-songy quality or having a predictable pattern in your read. Right now, there are very noticeable pauses at the end of sentences, making the delivery feel too structured and repetitive rather than natural and engaging. Try to vary your pacing and avoid pausing in the same places each time. Let the script flow more organically as if you’re speaking directly to someone.

There are some nice hints of a smile, which is great, but I’d love to hear more of it throughout the read. Right now, it comes through in small moments, but then it fades. I really want you to sound excited about what you’re talking about! If you struggle to feel that excitement naturally, think of something you genuinely love and bring that energy into this read. Enthusiasm is contagious—if you believe in what you’re saying, your audience will too.

Projection is sitting at about a 5, which isn’t quite enough to reflect the setting of a gym full of people. While the microphone is picking up your voice well, when I close my eyes, I don’t picture you in a gym projecting to a crowd. Right now, it sounds like you’re speaking into a mic rather than commanding a room. Lower the gain a bit and really engage your diaphragm. Imagine speaking to someone across the gym without shouting. This will give your voice the power and resonance needed to sell the scene effectively.

Overall, this read sounds a little nervous or lacking confidence, but I know you can push it further. This is a product you know is amazing, and you’re dying to tell everyone about it! Make sure that excitement is clear from start to finish.

A great moment is when you say “C’mon in, C’mon in”—the smile is definitely there, but it fades as the read progresses. Try to maintain that energy all the way through so the excitement doesn’t drop off.

This was a solid effort, and you’re so close to nailing it! Keep working on projection, confidence, and natural pacing, and this will feel even more engaging. Nice job!