Your smile and pronunciation at the beginning are very clear and concise, which is crucial for starting strong. That initial energy and clarity set the tone for the rest of the read, so you’re definitely on the right track there. Now, the main thing to focus on is projection.

Remember, you’re in a gym without a microphone, so your performance needs to reflect that environment. Right now, the projection feels too reserved, making it harder to believe the setting. You don’t need to shout, but you do need to engage your diaphragm and push more air through your voice to give it that natural, full-bodied projection. Imagine speaking to someone on the other side of the gym without straining—that level of support and resonance will help make your delivery more convincing.

The read feels a bit forced at times, as if you’re not fully committed to what you’re talking about, or as if you’re just pretending to care rather than genuinely engaging with the material. If the subject doesn’t naturally excite you, find something you’re passionate about and channel that energy into your performance. Think about how you’d sound if you were telling a friend about something that excites you—bringing that level of enthusiasm will make your read feel much more natural and engaging.

I do like the attempt and focus on the smile—it helps bring warmth to the delivery. However, there are pauses between a lot of sentences, which makes it seem like you’re trying to find your place in the script. This disrupts the flow of the performance and makes it feel less confident. A good way to combat this is to read through the script multiple times before recording so that the words feel familiar and natural. This will help you maintain a smooth, uninterrupted flow and avoid those hesitation pauses.

Overall, you have a strong foundation with a clear start, good pronunciation, and a solid smile. Now, focus on projection, commitment to the material, and smoother pacing to make your performance feel even stronger and more natural. Keep pushing forward—you’re almost there!