I like how you made it sound like a car salesman in a way. Also the way you paused on certain parts when it was a list of words along with articulating properly. You did a good job!

no kidding your voice is so perfect for advertisements! I think your pacing is really well done. it allows for very smooth reading and I love the way that you also stress some of the different adjectives like "deluxe" and all because it also really captures the audience's attention too for advertisements so nicely done!

Your pronunciation and enunciation are clear, and I can hear a hint of a smile in your voice, which is great! Try to amplify that smile a bit more as it really enhances the warmth of your delivery. The southern twang you've added gives your read a distinctive flair that sets it apart—well done on that. However, when it comes to projection, there's room to ramp it up. Right now, it sounds like you're addressing a small group rather than a gym full of people. Aim to project your voice further, as if you're reaching out to someone at the back of a large room. Remember, you are in a gym, and you don't have a microphone. Think about using your diaphragm more to push your volume up from a 5 to around a 7 or 8. Also, try to maintain your energy level throughout the entire performance. It seems to dip towards the end, so focus on keeping that initial enthusiasm and passion consistent right through to the last word. Maintaining a consistent level of high energy and enthusiasm from start to finish is crucial, especially when conveying excitement about a product. This sustained vigor will not only keep your audience engaged but also make your passion and excitement for the product unmistakably clear.