Alright people, let's do this one last time. (Serious) My name is Peter Benjamin Parker. I am the world’s One, and Only, Spider-Man. I’m sure you know the rest.

I saved a citizen. Fell off a building. Got punched in the face. Swung directly into a wall. Did some pushups on top of a building. Also did a Cartwheel on top of that building. I also.. Fell.. off that building (Clears throat and rushes to the next line) I went on a jog, a walk, and a run. Got into sports, maybe a bit too much. Buried Uncle Ben. Learned a couple flips. And so on, and so forth. (Serious, but also a “gloomy”/exhausted tone.)

Oh yeah, I also learned This! (Epic sounding) Yup.. I did that. (Embarrassed) There’s only one Spider-Man, and you’re looking at him. (Serious) Wait, there is only one right? (Sound like you’re going off script)