It is so fun how conversational and natural you make this feel. It definitely seems like you're remembering her! I think it's good that you have pauses, but sometimes the pauses are a little long between phrases, in my opinion. That would be my only critic as a peer, but it was such a fun read and I think you did a fantastic job! I really enjoyed listening to you!

Good job with this! I do think a bit more energy would go a long way in making the performance more engaging. Try to project a little more and maintain that as you go through your read. I wanna challenged you to put even more you in this read, who is Mrs. Mary? Is she someone special to you? I want to feel that! Right now it doesnt feel as like this is someone special in your life. It feels more like this someone you just knew. Think about Mrs. Mary as someone special in your life. Connect with the emotions and memories tied to her and let that personal connection shine through in your performance. By infusing the read with genuine energy and heartfelt moments, you can make the audience feel a deeper connection to the story. I challenge you to bring even more of yourself into the read. Show us why Mrs. Mary is so important to you and let that passion and tenderness shine through in your delivery. By doing so, you'll create a more engaging and memorable performance that resonates with the listener.