Oh man I'm loving the pacing and the emotion in this, man! you can really feel the frustration behind it! ;-; /

I like that you took your time and emphasized important parts to get your story across, but when you were emphasizing some words, you took a pretty big pause after them and then continued on which made it sound choppy. I could hear that you were taking smaller breaths in the beginning of sentences and losing your breath as you went on, so take deeper breaths to help give you more support to power through.