I have always been overweight, from being a child. I went to a strict Christian school, and luckily because of this I was never bullied because of my size- but you always notice the other kids staring.

I tried diets. Every single diet you can imagine: Atkins, cabbage soup, 5:2... You  name it, I've tried it. But they never work, I always end up caving and getting bigger.

I got bigger. I know what you're thinking, why? Why do this to yourself? Why put not only yourself but also your parents through this? Well, Diary, I'll tell you. IT'S BECAUSE I HAVE ZERO SELF CONTROL, OBVIOUSLY. Fuck. I hate myself. I can feel my rolls. I hate going clothes shopping. Nothing suits me. Sometimes I just sit in my bed and cry at how little control I have over my life.