Alexander, I need to speak with you. I contacted your teachers today. They told me that you did not show up for your tutoring session. Professor DeVris sat there for half an hour waiting for you. Why are you doing this to me Alexander?

Alexander, you have become very quiet lately. Why won’t you talk to me anymore? You never spend any time with me, son. You’re always wasting your life on that internet.

I know you talk to strangers online, son. Needless to say, I do not approve. Stop this immediately. If you don’t, I will have to take more drastic measures to make sure you’re acting properly on the computer. There are a lot of strangers on the internet - you can’t trust any of them, okay?