"It is the end of an era. The body of gang icon Julius Little was found this morning, and while the time of his passing has yet to be determined, his multiple gunshot wounds have ruled out accidental death. Does this mean that the gang epidemic is finally coming to an end? Or is this simply one more casualty in a continually mounting gang war? I'm Jane Valderamma, Channel 6 news."

"Behind me stands the broken husk of the Phillips Building. Once the proud--if not phallic--icon of Saints Row, the Phillips Building has since been changed into a destructive monument, sculpted by a group of deranged artists known collectively...as The Third Street Saints. I'm Jane Valderama, Channel 6 news."

"The celebrity of the 3rd Street Saints was put to a violent and destructive test in Stilwater. Patrons of a local bank were subjected to a mock hold-up by this internationally popular gang. However, excitement was replaced with panic when shots rang out and blood began to decorate the lobby. During the ensuing firefight, the bank's vault was ripped from the building, showering rubble down onto the bystanders below. The extent of the damage landed the Saints, like so many celebrities before them, in jail - at least for a few hours. This is Jane Valderamma with your Celebrity Crime News."