Hey Ashley - great stuff. Loved your opening. As soon as you said God Knows I'd like to, that would have been the best place to just take it down to be a bit more internalized - you were just rocking it up to then - but if you stay in that same place throughout then it becomes predictable now. Remember to play with volumes. Loud and soft (intimate/external) You're really starting to get this - i can hear you connecting and living in the moment as realistic as you could. She starts to go a bit intimate but she still almost pushes even when internal - but loved that you took it a bit internal. there was some nice discovery in here - loved your tearful moments - thought they were tasteful - just don't want her yelling the entire time and that is really all that is happening. You internalized at the end - so that was great to hear that - i would just direct this a bit and we'd be golden with a great scene. Good work

There is an underlying sas in this that is very fun. My only note is maybe more fluctuations in the emotions/volume to keep it fresh on the ears. Nice work!