the beginning is a bit slow, but when you start to feel those emotions I can tell you are feeling them. Great job!

So this took awhile before it came alive I can tell you were getting into it as you were going on. By the end you really sound like a person on a mission and your character work was 100% believable. Good Job

Way to push yourself. You do sound a bit bored until 20s in. The pace is great for clarity and time to shift gears internally, but gets a little sluggish at times, so you've got a great ability to ration your speed and energy. Now envision that listener is in front of you and how might it change or be spontaneous. Nice work, it's getting some of those nice feelings/empathy coming through as the spot progresses.