Oh, you kids and your dreams! So full of hope and ignorance! Someday, you'll learn that no matter how righteous you think you're cause is, there's always someone bigger to keep you down! And that day is today, and that someone is me.

Haha, don't worry kids! These two will take you on a tour of our great camp and answer any questions you might have. In fact, we should go on that tour right now, all of us, together, away from this spot.

But what makes this camp so special is that it has the heart and ambition to be all of those camps while still providing the individual attention that each child deserves! Whether it be Nerd Camp for... Neil? Or Adventure Camp for- Girl Neil! And if my words aren't enough to convince you, then I'll prove it!