“Our top story today, writer and theater director Sebastian Fox was found dead last night with his husband Vincent Moosington. There has been no leads yet but this flier was left at the crime scene.”

“Police are questioning the neighbors if they heard anything that might’ve been contributing to the passings.” 

“Although most of the cast of the meet the feebles variety hour have been killed during their last performance, we are suspecting one of them to be the culprit. We return with the following news after this break.”