... What? No! ... Are you kidding me? Writing erotic porn stories for pornographic websites to help “hone your writing skills”, is like saying I’m gonna do nude modeling to gain experience and make it big in normal modeling. -- Next thing you know you’re conquering trains ten dudes long. 

What in tarnation?! Sally, I gotta go.

Um, can I help you, Ma’am? Don’t even try any insurance scams, Ma’am, we got you on video doing whatever the HECK kind of horseplay that was that you were doing. I was sitting there at our security desk working on my online correspondence course from Deep Fried University, when I see this huge woman doing a jig right in front of the store as HER car hits her. Now, I’m sorry if you’re injured at all ... You aren’t injured are you? Cuz like I was saying..